Slipped the bonds of my incarceration today to get a bottle of Famous Grouse from our local Sainsbury’s. However The prowling gangs of bulk buyers had made a preemptive strike and stripped the shelves of Scotland’s ‘holy water’.
Not only that but as I was mourning my loss. I heard a loud commotion coming from the store’s self-service checkout area. The high pitched screaming and bawling sounded as a some sort of assault was being perpetrated on a young lady, so I made my way to the area to find two what appeared to be 10 year old boys being led away in handcuffs by three burly coppers! Perhaps the undernourished-looking desperados we’re trying to nick some food? Things are getting desperate out here!
Anyway after all the excitement I had a few glasses of Senatagen to calm my nerves and was promised by a young lady at the store that if I come at the crack of dawn tomorrow I may just be able to buy a bottle of the restorative nectar. I’m kipping in my car; hope I don’t sleep in!
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